Anything for Love
by Phlogistics
Summary: Love really did have a habit of turning people into drama queens... Or a drag queen, in his case. One-shot, AU. NaruSasuNaru.


**Anything for Love**

Sasuke had always thought that Romeo and Juliet were whiny, overdramatic teenagers. Actually, he still thought that, but at least now he could sympathize. Love really did have a habit of turning people into drama queens.

Or a drag queen, in his case.

He tugged nervously on his too-short skirt, his left eyebrow twitching as he surveyed the interior of the club. Mentally he composed a list of offensive flaws: poorly lit, hideous wallpaper, a surplus of overly detailed homoerotic posters, and the neon P in the club's name, _Free Pass_, kept blinking, causing the sign to read "Free Ass"… he could go on, but Sasuke found that if he thought about it too much, everything just seemed that much more unbearable.

Now, normally Sasuke wouldn't be caught dead in a place like this. (Or alive, for that matter; not that he would be for much longer if he kept having to endure the lustful stares of that freak on the other end of the bar. Seriously, was that his _tongue_…?) But Sasuke had a mission to accomplish, and if spending a few hours in this dump would help him reach his goal, then he could survive. At least, he hoped so. Honestly, though, Sasuke was beginning to doubt the wisdom of his choice.

The bartender, a large-muscled "woman" in her late twenties, noticed Sasuke's suffering look and smiled at him, offering to refill his glass. He gratefully accepted, and immediately downed his fourth strawberry daiquiri. He glared its empty bottom. The thing he hated most about the stupid fruity drinks was that they were mostly fruit with barely any alcohol.

Sasuke really missed beer.

He scowled at his own longing. He was doing what needed to be done, damn it! He and Itachi had discussed it in depth, and they had both come to the same conclusion: as he was now, Sasuke simply wasn't ready. He needed to be prepared for the big day… but a week just wasn't enough! How was Sasuke going to completely gay-ify himself by Naruto's birthday if he kept having beer cravings and not having fun at gay bars?!

Swearing under his breath, Sasuke pushed himself away from the counter. It was pointless, he concluded, and not worth humiliating himself for anymore. He wasn't going to be able to totally revamp his personality in such a short amount of time, and, frankly, he really didn't want to. Sasuke liked being a sophisticated, athletic jackass, and if Naruto couldn't accept that—well, it would probably crush Sasuke's soul, but at least it'd still be _his_ soul.

Grabbing his coat at the door, and trying to ignore the fact it fell lower than his miniskirt when he put it on, Sasuke felt a fierce determination fill him. He knew exactly what he had to do, and he knew he had to do it now; he was going to go to Naruto's apartment, knock on the door, say hello, and then announce his undying love for his best friend. Direct and to the point- it should work.

Sasuke called a taxi and paid the driver one hundred dollars up front- "That should be enough to get me eight blocks from here, and if it's not, then whatever company you work for is obviously going out of business, and you need all the cash you can get anyways,"- fed the man Naruto's address, and then slunk into the back seat to fantasize.

Naruto would still be awake despite the late hour, probably up playing video games. He'd great Sasuke enthusiastically, always happy to have his best friend drop by.

_("Hi, Sasuke!"_

_"Hello."_

_"What are you doing here?")_

Never one to beat around the bush, Sasuke would get straight to the point.

_("I'm here to tell you that I'm deeply in love with you.")_

And, of course, Naruto would _have_ to feel the same way.

_("Wow, really? What a coincidence, because I'm totally in love with you too!"_

_"Obviously. Who wouldn't be?"_

_"Oh, Sasuke!")_

That was the scene playing through Sasuke's head up until he was actually standing outside of Naruto's door. He swallowed hard, suddenly unable to remember why he had felt so self-assured earlier. For a moment, he contemplated turning around and going home. After all, there was no shame in doing something cowardly as long as no one ever realized you had done it. Sadly, he had had to buzz Naruto to get into the apartment building, so Naruto probably would realize something had happened.

At that moment, Naruto appeared inside the doorway, looking fatigued and irritated. "Why are you here?" he asked, yawning.

Sasuke coughed, shifting his weight from foot to foot. "I… well, I just wanted to…"

Naruto blinked, his eyes squinting as he gave Sasuke a once-over. "Why the hell are you wearing a high school girl's uniform?"

Sasuke froze, having completely forgotten to take into account his rather absurd attire. Instead of answering the question, he immediately turned to leave. "It's nothing, and you're obviously very tired. I must've woken you up. I'll just talk to you some other time, no big deal, bye--"

Naruto grabbed Sasuke's arm before he could escape. "Nuh-uh. It's two in the morning and I _know_ you've got classes tomorrow. It's obviously something important, or you wouldn't be here." Naruto gave Sasuke a look, one of those guilting, pathetic, "I'm your best friend…. Please, please tell me?" looks that Sasuke always gave into.

Stuttering uncharacteristically, Sasuke forced out a few more half-assed excuses. "I just, you know, c-couldn't really think of anything, to, ah, do, and I figured maybe you'd, I don't know, want to just, um… well. Are you going to go to see that new film, um, what's it called? Just thought I'd ask… and, ah…" he trailed off, realizing he wasn't fooling anyone. He cleared his throat awkwardly, wondering how long it would take to drown in his own blood if he bit off his tongue.

Oblivious to Sasuke's mental anguish, and wanting to be done with him and get back to sleep, Naruto snapped, "Why are you avoiding talking to me? _Teme_, always being so aloof and cool, can't even tell your best friend about something that's obviously bothering you-"

"I love you!"

Naruto's mouth snapped shut with an audible _click_. He stared wide-eyed at Sasuke for a moment, clearly surprised by the other's sudden outburst, before his face clouded over with thoughtfulness. Sasuke mentally kept up a panicked mantra of "_shit shit shit shit shit shit shit_" as he waited for the Naruto to say something. What was Naruto thinking? Was he trying to figure out how to let Sasuke down easy? Or was he just too disgusted by the fact his best friend had a huge gay crush on him too speak?

Finally, his reply came.

"Okay."

Sasuke blinked. "…Okay?"

Naruto nodded. "Okay."

Sasuke couldn't believe his ears. "I tell you that I'm in love with you and all you can think of to say is "Okay?!"" he exclaimed.

Shrugging, Naruto responded, "Well, yeah. Because it_ is_-- okay, I mean." He grinned. "It actually makes me feel kinda happy. Probably because I love you too."

Silence. "Oh." Pause. "Okay."

Naruto chuckled, and then leaned over and gave Sasuke a quick kiss on the lips. Sasuke stood still for a moment, soaking in the moment, a blissful little smile on his face.

"So," he said, blushing a little, "I guess I'll be going now. Class tomorrow and all that."

"Yeah," Naruto agreed. A moment passed, though, and he frowned. "But, seriously, what's with the skirt?"

**End.**

_Author's Note_: Well, that was the first Naruto fic I've ever written on this account, and the first Naruto fic I've written at all in over a year. It's kind of suckish, but that's okay with me. I enjoyed writing it, and I thought it was at least a little funny. Sasuke and Itachi really seem to me like they're the type of dorky brothers who would sit down and discuss what Sasuke would have to do to "gay-ify" himself so he could win his dream boy.

Please review! Constructive criticism more than welcome, and it's always nice to hear from the people who enjoyed something I wrote (as you tend to be few and far between).


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